What’s really sad is this is so unusual it made the news -
When the officiant tells Claudaniel Fabien he can kiss his bride at the altar Saturday, no one will fault the couple for a little “should I tilt my head this way, or that way?” awkwardness.
It will be the couple’s very first kiss.
h/t Challies
I actually had a roommate in college that had never kissed anyone. When she and her husband married, they had never kissed. It was her first kiss – ever! I was so inspired by her high standards and commitment to the Lord that my husband and I prayed about it and decided to not kiss again until we married.
We weren’t engaged at the time, and it was another 2 1/2 years before we said “I do.” I was so glad we made that decision. That kiss was amazing and special. I only wish someone had encouraged me to wait before then. Of course, my husband was my first boyfriend, so he’s still the only guy I’ve ever kissed.
I think failure to kiss before marriage is extrabiblical and foolishly ascetic (Colossians 2:23). A man would actually be unwise to marry a girl without kissing her, because without a kiss, he would have no way of knowing if she were icy or prudish. (Similarly, a girl might not want to marry a guy who never offered to pay for her and who never indicated an industrious or chivalrous nature.)
Thomas More actually suggested (in the ridiculous socialist book Utopia) that couples should see each other naked before marrying. That seems a bit extreme to me, but you do need to know who you’re marrying. I certainly oppose promiscuity, but non-kissing benefits no one.
Well, there’s certainly no specific command to not kiss before marriage, but the principle of purity is pretty clear, and believers who are convicted about it are not wrong to refrain. Just as with alcohol – some people are honestly not convicted about it. I sometimes serve wine with a meal, and have occasionally ordered a mixed drink when we’re out for dinner. Drunkeness is verboten, but I really don’t think all alcohol is off limits. Other believers are strongly convinced it is sinful, and feeling as they do, they’re right to refuse to drink.
As to the icy or prudish… if he can’t tell that from her personality, he ought not consider marrying her to begin with.
I used to subscribe to the idea that it was ridiculous to think of marrying someone without knowing if the sex would be any good. The truth is, the sex inevitably becomes good after the emotional commitment is made. When two people love each other sacrificially, are committed to one another and each motivated to please the other one, how can the sex be anything BUT good?