Christian Alert!

I used to keep a TV in my office for background noise, and if I were feeling particularly slothful, to watch instead of work. One day in my channel surfing I landed on this show called Greek; some kind of night-time soap opera on the trials and tribulations of college students. (And I’m sympathetic, honestly – you couldn’t pay me to relive the years between 18 and 25 even though I wasn’t even in college most of that time.)  It was a marathon showing of the entire first season to entice people to tune in to the second season premiere later that night. For the hapless, annoying conservative Christian character, they pulled out every stereotype in the book, fed them steroids, put them on a tough exercise regimen and added some bionics.  They then applied those uber-stereotypes to a geeky science major who annoyed nearly everyone he encountered.  In later episodes he became a little more engaging, but at the beginning he was extremely cringe-worthy.

This Onion article reads like a profile of that guy.

Fellow Dormmates Warned About Christian In 462

GAINESVILLE, FL–In an address before three fellow residents of Tenney Hall’s fourth-floor west wing Tuesday, University of Florida sophomore Jeff Arnell, 18, issued a warning about the Christian in 462.

“If you see the guy who lives in the single down at the end of the hall, get away,” Arnell told Troy Rasbach, Pete Marquez and Jonathan Wilkins, who had assembled in Arnell’s room to watch SportsCenter. “He’ll totally corner you and start telling you about Jesus.”

The four dormmates who assembled in Arnell’s room have developed a Christian-avoidance strategy, one which includes “scoping out” the fourth-floor west wing for the possible presence of Leske before discussing the purchase of alcoholic beverages; avoiding Leske in the dorm’s dining hall and study area; and agreeing to “rescue” each other from conversations with the Christian in the event of accidental contact.

“We have got to be majorly careful,” Arnell said. “He’ll suck you in, dude.”

Those kind of aggressive sales tactics aren’t just offensive.  They’re unneccessary.  Henry Neufield writes,

“some Christians who want to push themselves on everyone in a frantic race to convert and bring into church membership as many people as possible. “Jesus is coming back,” they think, “and he’s going to accidentally fry a bunch of people if I don’t get busy.” The answer, they seem to think, is to work on the statistics as fast as possible.”

It’s Christianity, not Amway.  We’re not God’s sales staff.  There are no quotas.  We should be sensitive to opportunities to witness to people, but manipulation, high-pressure sales tactics and trying to “lawyer” someone into Christianity don’t help.  As Peter put it,

But dedicate your lives to Christ as Lord. Always be ready to defend your confidence in God when anyone asks you to explain it. However, make your defense with gentleness and respect. Keep your conscience clear. Then those who treat the good Christian life you live with contempt will feel ashamed that they have ridiculed you.
(1 Peter 3:15-16)

To break that down… if we dedicate our lives to Christ not just as Savior to whom we owe gratitude, but as Lord to whom we owe obedience, then our lives will look so different that it will provoke questions.  Which we can then answer, gently and respectfully.